| I know ya'll are gonna think I'm pulling your | | | | sorts of rumors started about what my answers |
| legs, but I swear on a stack of BTO CDs that | | | | might be. Her first question was, |
| I received the following email just a couple | | | | |
| of days ago.... | | | | "Have you ever written anything while in the |
| | | | nude?" |
| Ed, | | | | |
| | | | The answer to that is an unequivocal NO! I |
| I just wanted to drop you a quick note and | | | | write in an old wood chair, and most of the |
| tell you how much I enjoy reading your | | | | time it's a cold wood chair. Make that a very |
| various writings. I get "Free Wheelin'" in my | | | | cold wood chair. There's a better chance of |
| local paper, and after reading some of your | | | | me writing in a pink tu-tu than there is of |
| columns I went and purchased your first book. | | | | me writing naked. |
| I'm also pleased to learn that you have a | | | | |
| second one that's just out. Congratulations | | | | The next, and thankfully last one, |
| on your writing successes. | | | | |
| | | | "If not, would you consider it if you felt it |
| My name is Peggy, and I live in Tampa, | | | | would help your creativity? |
| Florida. To be more precise, I live in a | | | | |
| nudist resort just outside of Tampa called | | | | NO! Being naked, cold, and embarrassed would |
| "Eye Full City." I find the lifestyle to be | | | | not help my creativity in the least. |
| exhilarating, and I actually find that it | | | | |
| stimulates my creativity. My hobby is | | | | You know, stuff like this makes me wonder |
| painting landscapes, and I always do my best | | | | what's the world coming to? Why's there all |
| work when my mind is free of stress and my | | | | this hoopla about being naked in public |
| body is free of clothing. | | | | places? Last night, they had someone on |
| | | | Entertainment Tonight who's starting a nude |
| I was wondering if the same thing might be | | | | airline! I kid you not! You buy a ticket to |
| true of writing. Have you ever written | | | | fly somewhere with them, and as soon as the |
| anything while in the nude? If not, would you | | | | plane is in the sky and the pilot turns off |
| consider doing it if you felt it would help | | | | the "fasten seatbelt" sign, you're free to |
| your creativity? | | | | drop your drawers! Can you imagine it? People |
| | | | walking up and down the aisles of the plane |
| Looking forward to your answer, | | | | naked as jaybirds. What if the plane happened |
| | | | to hit some turbulence, and some eighty year |
| Peggy Pinkapples | | | | old guy with a flabby gut was headed down the |
| | | | aisle? It's too horrible to even think about. |
| Let me first go on the record and state that | | | | Or what if some nudist spills a cup of hot |
| I didn't write Peggy back. Didn't even think | | | | coffee in their lap? The one positive thing |
| about it, to be honest. A woman that paints | | | | about that would be the creative cussing that |
| in the nude and asks a stranger if he writes | | | | would slip from the scalded person's lips, |
| his stuff while naked is not a woman I'd want | | | | but the rest would not be pretty. |
| to know. Frankly, the only flakes I want to | | | | |
| become acquainted with are in my favorite | | | | Frankly, not everyone is meant to run around |
| cereal, Post Raisin Bran - not naked female | | | | naked, and I'll freely admit to being one of |
| ones from Florida. Plus, I'll bet you | | | | those that needs to stay clothed. Being naked |
| anything and a dollar that there are mops in | | | | needs to be confined to just two activities, |
| my closet more attractive than this woman is. | | | | and let's face it - we all know what they |
| There's no doubt about it in my mind at all - | | | | are, and I'll keep my editors happy by not |
| let's face it, if she was a fox, no self | | | | going into detail about them here. Other than |
| respecting husband/boyfriend would let her go | | | | that, we ought to keep our clothes on at all |
| prancing around naked all the time. | | | | times. May as well keep some level of mystery |
| | | | going about things as the vast majority of us |
| Even though I won't be getting to know her, | | | | aren't candidates for centerfolds when we're |
| let me be sure and answer her two questions. | | | | naked. As Ed Jr. told me one time years ago, |
| If I don't, there are guys out there like | | | | it's one thing for people to think you're a |
| Jackie Little, Mike Griffin, and Greg | | | | haint, but it's a whole 'nother thing to go |
| Berryhill who might be tempted to get all | | | | out of your way to prove it to them... |